6 Words and Phrases to Banish from Your Vocabulary

6 Words and Phrases to Banish from Your Vocabulary It was my mother who first outlawed certain words from my vocabulary. The ones I remember are â€Å"but,† â€Å"have to† and â€Å"should.† Later in life, I took some courses that added â€Å"try† and â€Å"can’t† to the list (Yoda would approve). Most recently, â€Å"just† joined the ranks of words to avoid. I may have been in the minority ten years ago as someone with hyper-awareness of how certain small words affect our messaging. But more recently, I’ve encountered more people who pay attention to the implications that subtle turns of phrase have on our meaning. Let’s take a look at the impact of each of these words- and at alternative ways to express ourselves. 1. But (Say â€Å"and† or â€Å"while† instead!) If you start paying attention to how often you use the word â€Å"but,† you might be surprised. Often the word is completely unnecessary and what you really mean is â€Å"and†! For instance, one of my writers wrote the following: I wanted to make sure that the client’s profile was succinct but clearly revealed his differentiating qualities. I notice that people frequently default to â€Å"but† in situations like this, where they want to say something was â€Å"short but sweet† or something along those lines. Why say â€Å"but†? Who says that being short implies â€Å"not sweet†? Who says that a profile’s being â€Å"succinct† implies that it doesn’t reveal a client’s differentiating qualities? Instead, how about this: I wanted to make sure that the client’s profile was succinct while clearly revealing his differentiating qualities. In this second sentence, the challenge of creating a profile that includes the client’s differentiating qualities is laid out in a positive light and does not imply a succinct profile could not reveal those qualities. It’s a subtle difference, and a significant one. I was pleased to discover that a Stanford University professor, Bernard Roth, has taken up the cause to substitute â€Å"but† with â€Å"and.† See A Stanford professor says eliminating 2 phrases from you vocabulary can make you more successful. As he explains, When you use the word but, you create a conflict (and sometimes a reason) for yourself that does not really exist. †¦ whereas when you use the word and, your brain gets to consider how it can deal with both parts of the sentence.† Take the following sentence: I want to go to the movies, but I have to study. vs this one: I want to go to the movies, and I have studying to do. Changing â€Å"but† to â€Å"and† trains the brain to come up with win-win solutions, rather than creating a state of victimhood. 2. Have to (Say â€Å"going to† or â€Å"want to† instead) The movie vs. studying example above highlights another phrase that does not serve us: â€Å"Have to.† Professor Roth suggests substituting â€Å"want to.† I like substituting â€Å"going to.† Let’s take a look at the sentence above again, with the word â€Å"and† substituted for â€Å"but†: I want to go to the movies, and I have to study. (This still sounds fairly catastrophic.) What about these options: I want to go to the movies, and nevertheless I am going to study. (Suddenly this person has choice in the matter!) It would probably be pushing it to say â€Å"I want to go to the movies, and I want to study.† That might not be completely honest. But it’s a sentiment to try on. 3. Try (There is no â€Å"try†) There’s a difference between trying something as an experiment (see my above suggestion to try something on or try something out) and saying you’ll try to do something when what you really mean is you don’t think you’ll succeed. Trying is lying. Trying is not doing. I can try all I want to write a blog article every Sunday. That doesn’t get me to writing a blog article every week. It gets me going out with friends on Sunday nights while Im busy â€Å"trying†- and while my blog remains blank. We use the â€Å"try† word when we want to weasel out of things, whether they are commitments to ourselves or others. Saying you’ll â€Å"try† is pretending to say â€Å"yes† when you mean â€Å"probably not.† Stop it. Instead, choose the actions you are willing to take. Say â€Å"I will do x, y and z.† Or say you aren’t going to do it. There is no â€Å"try.† 4. Should (Don’t â€Å"should† on yourself or on others) â€Å"Should† is a close relative to â€Å"have to.† It’s a moral judgment that often leads to a whole lot of trying. Do you think you â€Å"should† go to the doctor? â€Å"Should† go to the gym? â€Å"Should† apologize to someone you love? Or do you think someone in your life â€Å"should† do something and are you telling them so? How’s that working for you? Take this example: You should stop eating so much sugar, honey. You’ll make yourself sick! vs. I want you to eat less sugar, honey. I’m so scared you’ll get sick. (The â€Å"you† in this sentence could be yourself or someone else.) To me, the second version is much more vulnerable and scary to say. It’s less judgmental. If I’m saying it to myself, it’s actually sweet and caring. And although it could produce defensiveness, it’s less likely to do so than the version that takes a moral high ground and tries to control someone’s behavior. Some of us â€Å"should† on ourselves even more than we â€Å"should† on others. Take a look at how you’re putting yourself down with that sentiment, and how you use â€Å"should† to let yourself off the hook instead of committing to something. 5. Can’t (I think I can!) This one is basic. â€Å"Can’t† is a disempowering word that leads to a lot of inaction. Instead of â€Å"can’t,† be curious about how you can. Look for other options than the one or two you are considering. Get coaching. Read The Little Engine That Could for inspiration. Get creative! As a friend and I often say to each other, the only 100% reliable way to reach a goal is not to stop until you accomplish it! And if you choose a different goal along the way, that’s okay too. 6. Just (I called to say â€Å"I love you.†) The word â€Å"just† diminishes what we say after it. Calling to say â€Å"I love you† is a big deal right? Why make it smaller, as the famous song does, with â€Å"just†? I was unaware until about a year ago of how much I qualify my sentences with the word â€Å"just.† Common usages could be â€Å"I just wanted you to know that†¦Ã¢â‚¬  or â€Å"I just feel like†¦Ã¢â‚¬  or â€Å"I just thought†¦Ã¢â‚¬  If you start paying attention, you might be surprised at the frequency of the word â€Å"just† in your vocabulary. See what happens if you delete it. Your communications might become more truthful and riskier. You might start to claim your feelings, opinions and choices in a new way. Did you learn something from this article about your language? Did you try eliminating any of the recommended words? Are there more words that you recommend banishing from our vocabularies? Please share!

Technology and the Minds of Man Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words

Technology and the Minds of Man - Essay Example Einstein's theories have made spaceflight, nuclear energy, and the discovery of universes beyond our own possible, but the question still haunts us; can an atomic bomb fall into the hands of a global tyrant. Today's technology has made it possible to peer into a man's life, follow his every move, create his most intimate moods, and build an offspring to his exacting specifications. Science can hold the keys to progress or build the doomsday machine. Still, the scientists have no obligation to assure that the science they create will be used responsibly. It is the citizens of the global community that are given the task to make an ethically sound decision. Science's simple goals are to discover and create, while it is society that needs to exert the cultural pressures needed to control our runaway technology. The horror stories that relate to the egregious misuse of technology fill our headlines on a daily basis. The war on terror has been used as a justification for using cutting edge technology to spy on American citizens, as well as hunt down and interrogate the nation's alleged enemies. While the human intuition recoils in fear and disgust at the insideous use of science to interrogate prisoners, the argument in favor of it is neither new or without merit. Michael Koubi, a former chief interrogator for Israel's General Security Services, has for decades been, "experimenting with captive human beings, cajoling, tricking, hurting, threatening, and spying on them, steadily upping the pressure, looking for cracks at the seams" (Bowden). Sixty-five years ago pharmaceutical giant Eli Lilly experimented with altering the moods of primates by implanting electrodes in their brain (Bowden). It has been widely reported that these technologies are currently being used to interrogate terrorists b y the US government and its agents. Government secrets are often slow to surface, and they may have newer and more effective methods that are yet to be reported. Yet, Eli Lilly is not the morally responsible agent for the decision to put their technology to use on an involuntary human subject. Advocates point to the necessity of getting time sensitive information from a suspect, and technical interrogation is often helpful in saving thousands of innocent lives. Indeed, an educated person can make a solid moral argument for sacrificing one criminal's suffering to save thousands of blameless victims. However, there is a point on the scale of morality where we begin to fall down the slippery slope to anarchy and chaos, where we violate the humanness of mankind. Society, the government, and the law need to be firm, decisive, and ethical in their effort to control these centuries old urges, techniques, and strategies. The use of technology is no more controversial than it is when it involves the sanctity of the human body. Medicine can transplant vital organs, regenerate body parts, and sustain life well beyond the natural term. Today, medical science has almost made it possible to order a baby as easily as we order a cheeseburger at a drive-up window. Genetic manipulation will soon offer people the opportunity to select a baby's most detailed traits such as hair color, musical

Marriage, families and relationships; making choices in a diverse Case Study

Marriage, families and relationships; making choices in a diverse society - Case Study Example People stay together and lose focus on the right thing to do after staying together for too long. Another reason is the low quality of life. They believe that, lives of couples living together cannot be compared to those of married couples. There is an increase in the number of Americans who are unmarried because of a number of reasons. One of the chief explanations is that, the career choices taken by many individuals today are demanding (Lamanna & Riedmann, 2012). Time taken to concentrate on the right thing to do with regards to career limits the time taken to have a family. This is considered one of the main reasons as to why people remain unmarried in modern society. Another reason could be the demise of a partner or unfaithfulness. These factors can cause people to make the choice of remaining alone, instead of suffering the heartache of losing someone. Moreover, the preferred lifestyle of choice prevents many people from committing to marriage. The sense of responsibility among people today is not as it used to be long ago. People tend to remain unmarried since the thought of responsibility does not appeal to the modern person. Not everyone who has children wants to have them. There are some pressures that society places on individuals to have children in order to fit in this setting (Lamanna & Riedmann, 2012). One of the social pressures that ensure people have children is, to create the setting they grew up around as children. When people grow up, the urge to create and develop something similar to what they had as children tends to overwhelm people. This leads to the formation of a family, complete with a wife and children. People also have children so that they can feel immortal. They tend to think that they go on living through their children after death, or old age. In many societies, it is seen as a sign of strength. Children usually seal the deal between married

Decision Making and Reasoning Essay Example for Free

Decision Making and Reasoning Essay There are different types of decisions that we must make as well. From simple choices when planning for a vacation or making more life changing choices that require a detailed, logical analysis concerning what to do. Questions about strategy use have been treated in several different lines of decision-making. Largely, a distinction arises in terms of when and why deliberative processing best describes decision-making behavior. Under novel decision-making conditions, there is no prior experience to guide the decision-making process. The process involves selecting the appropriate strategy. Under repetitive successful decision-making conditions, there is a long history of experience. Some decisions become automatic in the sense that they require no deliberation. In this process, we address the issue of how decision processes transit from more controlled or deliberative strategies, to simple decision rules, and finally to automatic or routine strategies. What one sees as rational behavior in many of the social situations that have been studied is likely to depend on whether one conceives of rationality as enlightened self-interest in a fairly narrow sense, or one factors in the roles of such variables as self-image and conscience, or one allows for the possibility that a rational person might take a genuine interest in the welfare of other people, independently of his or her own. In other words, what is perceived as a dilemma from one perspective may not be a dilemma as perceived from another; a decision problem that is very difficult when assessed relative to one set of values may be very easy when assessed relative to another set. Dilemmas are difficult decision problems, necessitating, as they often do, choices between equally unsatisfactory (or in some cases equally attractive) options. Some social dilemmas pit self-interest against the common good. What constitutes rational behavior in dealing with dilemmas has been a question of interest to many theorists and students of human reasoning. Certain prototypical situations—notably various versions of the prisoners dilemma have been intensively studied with the hope of gaining insights into the determinants of competitive and cooperative behavior. However, along the way, we may use simple rules to decide when and where to stop and which specific routes to take, depending on incidental factors such as traffic. It is important to understand how these various decision domains are differently perceived and processed. (Betsch et al, 2004, p1) Strategies That Guide Human Decision Making A strategy is used to refer to processes which are relatively slow, goal-directed, systematic, and under explicit conscious control. However, it is also argued that to reason deductively rather than inductively does require a conscious effort at deduction and only occurs in response to specific instructions. Thus deduction is seen as a strategy. An account of strategic deductive reasoning with the mental models framework is preferred. (DYdewalle et al, 2000, p1) The strategic phases of decision making are the generation phase, the evaluation phase, and the learning phase. In a very rough sense, these phases correspond to the periods before, during, and after one makes a decision, respectively. Hence, they can be viewed as three successive points in time, but there is a great deal of recursion that can occur between phases. (Klein et al, 2001, p31) The tendency to implement appropriate behaviors strategies is apparent by the number of techniques available. For example, vigilant problem solving found that most executives report that they engage in one of a number of simplistic strategies for arriving at a solution. These simplistic strategies of simple decision rules are grouped them into cognitive categories. The cognitive decision rules: 1. Unreflectively using a standard operating procedure, 2. Accepting the first alternative that comes to mind that is good enough to meet the minimal requirements (satisfying), 3. Searching ones mind for a well-known analogy that turns out to be inappropriate (analogizing), 4. Consolidating the choice discovered through rules (1) to (3) and bolstering it in ones mind by focusing mainly on the positive features of the choice, 5. Saving time and effort by getting someone who has looked into the issues to provide a brief description of what one should do and why (the nutshell briefing rule). (Byrnes, 1998, p21) For example in a case study format, Suppose that a student already possesses some automatic but dysfunctional strategies for making the decisions the instructor seeks to have make well. Then, before the training effort can begin in earnest, those â€Å"bad habits† have to be eliminated. This will be a prodigious task because, by their nature, the already established strategies will initiate themselves effortlessly, uncontrollably, and beyond the trainees consciousness. Because decision making is such a fundamental human activity, which each of us has practiced day-in and day-out all our lives, perhaps the majority of our decision strategies are automated. This means that it is folly to think that it is even possible to fundamentally change a persons basic decision-making dispositions. (Klein et al, 2001, p25) Managerial leadership is generally considered a major factor in organizational behavior because of its putative effect on individuals, groups, and organizational outcomes. Some regard leadership as a special case of social influence. But progress has been very slow in understanding why leaders exert influence in certain situations while not in others. Research has not produced particularly robust and reliable findings in this regard.

English Immersion Programs: Who is Targeted? Essay -- Essays Papers

English Immersion Programs: Who is Targeted? The topic of immigrant students entering not only our country but our public school systems, is slowly becoming a bigger and bigger controversy within the United States. Students are coming in from all over the world and entering our English-speaking school system without a word of English in their vocabulary. When they are thrown into the melting pot of today’s pubic schools, their presence affects so many more people than one would think. My belief that English immersion should replace bilingual programs can be correlated with three main groups all taking opposing stances on my argument. The three primarily affected groups are the immigrant students themselves, today’s workforce, and the bilingual education teachers. These three groups, all things considered, all take different approaches to the abolishment of bilingualism. Students would most likely agree with English immersion so that they can adapt better and sooner, while teachers would most likely disagree because their entire curriculum and teaching style would be subject to drastic changes. While these two groups are extreme opposites, today’s workforce serves to go either way. The three groups: students, the workforce and bilingual education teachers, serve as representatives for the many sides of the controversial changing of bilingual education in today’s high schools. Students are without a doubt, the most affected group within the bilingual education controversy. They are the children who are entering a new environment at one of the most crucial time in their lives. They need to learn the academics to help them succeed in the future, but how can they learn anything if they don’t even speak English? Fo... ...English immersion programs. There are perhaps thousands of groups that are and will be affected by bilingual education now and in the future. However, three main groups are affected more directly than most. Their correlation with the bilingual education controversy makes their standpoint on English immersion very biased. Students, today’s workforce, and bilingual teachers take very different sides when the education debate is considered. These three groups represent different sides of the growing controversy over the replacement of bilingual education with English immersion education in the United States. Works Cited: Valdà ©s, Guadalupe. Learning and Not Learning English. New York: Teachers College Press, 2001. Valdez, Elsa O. â€Å"Winning the Battle, Losing the War: Bilingual Teachers and Post-Proposition 227.† The Urban Review 33 (2001): 237-53.

English Teacher

Name______________________________________ Date ______________________Block__ Subject-Verb Agreement – Exercise 1 Circle the correct verb in each sentence below. In the line next to the sentence write down the rule# it applies to. 1. Emily and Greg (comes,   come) to my house every Friday for lunch. Rule#_____ 2. There (is,   are) time to watch the movie. Rule#_____ 3. My friends who are in the band (wants,   want) me to play a musical instrument. Rule#_____ 4. My father or my brothers (is,   are) coming with me to the ball game. Rule#_____ 5. Everyone (needs, need) time to relax. Rule#_____ . That bag of oranges (looks, look) fresh. Rule#_____ 7. The lacrosse team (hopes, hope) to win the tournament next week. Rule#_____ 8. Your trousers (needs, need) to be cleaned. Rule#_____ 9. Some of the books on the shelf (is, are) dusty. Rule#_____ 10. Even though the students like the class, a few (thinks, think) that it is too complicated Rule#_____ ———â⠂¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€Ã¢â‚¬â€- Top of Form Name______________________________________ Date ______________________Block__ Subject-Verb Agreement – Exercise 2 Circle the correct verb in each sentence below.In the line next to the sentence write down the rule# it applies to. 1. Mumps (is, are) not common among adults. Rule#_____ 2. Viruses from third world countries (is, are) a major concern. Rule#_____ 3. Most of the sand (is, are)   wet from the high tide. Rule#_____ 4. Either the two kittens or the puppy (sits, sit) in my lap while I watch television. Rule#_____ 5. A subject of great interest (is, are) rainforests. Rule#_____ 6. Hansel and Gretel (is, are) a famous children's story. Rule#_____ 7. The team members (is, are) arguing over the defense tactics. Rule#_____ 8. The economics of the trip (was, were) pleasing.Rule#_____ 9. Why (is, are) your parents going to Africa for a vacation? Rule#_____ 10. The mayor and the governor (hopes, hope) that the bill will soon become a law Rule#_____ Name______________________________________ Date ______________________Block__ Subject-Verb Agreement – Exercise 3 Circle the correct verb in each sentence below. In the line next to the sentence write down the rule# it applies to. ————————————————- Top of Form 1. The books from the library (need   needs) to be returned by Friday. Rule#_____ 2. The parents and the child often (watch  Ã‚   watches)   Disney movies. Rule#_____ 3.The phone that belongs to the two friends (have   has) finally run out of minutes. Rule#_____ 4. That pair of trousers (look   looks) good on you. Rule#_____ 5. Either Matilda or her brothers (use   uses) the symphony tickets each week. Rule#_____ 6. The crowd (were was) cheering wildly for Tom. Rule#_____ 7. The politics of this campaign (seemà ‚   seems) very complicated. Rule#_____ 8. Everyone at the company's headquarters (know   knows) the code to the safe. Rule#_____ 9. Gulliver's Travels (are   is)   one of my favorite books. Rule#_____ 10. Measles (cause   causes) a good deal of itching. Rule#_____ Bottom of Form Bottom of Form

Is There a Binding Contract between Mary and Ruby Free Essay Example, 1250 words

In Partridge v Crittenden, an advertisement had been placed in a magazine by the defendant. It stated that there were bramble finches for sale. The sale of these birds was an offence under the provisions of Section 6 of the Protection of Birds Act 1954. Thereafter, the defendant was convicted for this offence, which he appealed. The appellate court set aside the conviction, on the grounds that the advertisement was nothing more than an invitation to treat, and not an offer. Similarly, in our problem, Mary had placed an advertisement in a magazine, regarding the sale of the antique bakery cutters. This advertisement was merely an invitation to treat, as per the ruling in the above case. Consequently, the advertisement placed by Mary does not constitute an offer. Nevertheless, when the advertisement can be construed to contain an offer, any individual who accepts it will be entitled to a claim. This was the ruling in Carlill v Carbolic Smoke Ball Company. In Warlow v Harrison, the adv ertisement stated that an auction would be held without reserve. The court held that these terms of the auctioneer constituted an independent personal offer to the highest bidder in the auction. We will write a custom essay sample on Is There a Binding Contract between Mary and Ruby or any topic specifically for you Only $17.96 $11.86/page